


Forever is a Long Time Ago

by In_Time_of_Peril



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (Big Finish Audio)
Genre: F/F, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-22
Updated: 2014-07-22
Packaged: 2018-02-09 22:25:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2000202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/In_Time_of_Peril/pseuds/In_Time_of_Peril
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes you can see the end coming, and you know you can never stop it, so you just hold on until time rips you away from whatever you were always going to lose.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Forever is a Long Time Ago

**Author's Note:**

  * For [aceinnatailsuit](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=aceinnatailsuit).



Ace found Raine sitting on the edge of the bed in their room, totally absorbed in reading something.  She did not look up when Ace entered, nor did she respond to any of the sounds.  A pile of clothing slid to the floor, and Ace remembered another time, another room that had once been her own, and yelling at someone to just sit on the clothes because, then at least, it had never seemed to matter.  When had she changed that opinion?

The chair scraped along toward the bed and Ace was sitting, now wondering just when and how and why **her** room had become **their** room.  She cleared her throat, but there was still no sign that Raine even realised she was there.

"We should talk," Ace muttered.

"Hmm?  About what?"

"You bloody well know what, Raine.  About what we've just seen, what we've been through..."

Raine tossed her book aside and shrugged.

"There's nothing to discuss.  It was the same sort of experience we have all the time, the same sort of awful stuff that our lives are, day in and day out.  Or whatever passes for day in and out when you're traveling in time and space."

"Hey, it's not all so terrible!"

"Isn't it, Ace?  All the running is exhilarating, and the adventure - well, we've both always had that love of adventure.  But Ace, the rest of it..."

"Yeah, the bad stuff happens, but we can get past it!  We can just concentrate on the good times, the fun.  The Doctor..."

"Uses us," Raine cut in, standing suddenly.  
"He uses us for his own ends and we're lucky afterward if we get a 'well done' out of him."

"It's not like that.  There's a lot going on, a lot to plan.  He has to always think a few steps ahead..."

"Life doesn't all have to be a chess game!  Of course things have to be planned out, of course thinking ahead is a good thing.  But Ace, that doesn't require constantly turning everyone around you into your pawns."

Raine was standing over her, towering in a way, and Ace felt a queasy ache in her gut.  She had felt it before, but usually not without being shot in that general area first.  Suddenly, she wanted to throw her arms around Raine's waist and apologise for anything, everything, and to make it all good again.

"I know you're tired of it all," she started, but then she had no idea what else she wanted to say, so instead she stood and gripped Raine's shoulders.  
"Just - traveling with the Doctor is never easy."

"Of course.  I know that.  But Ace, I don't think I can handle much more of it.  The lying and the fighting and..."

"Please.  Please, don't go.  I know you're thinking about it and..."

"I'm an adult.  I suppose I can come and go as I please."

"But you're - you're my friend.  I - we need you around here, Raine.  In the TARDIS, with us."

Raine's expression was mostly blank, but she was gnawing on her lower lip.

"Please," Ace tried again, but Raine shook her head.

"I won't be here much longer.  I can't be.  I need my own world, my own life..."

"You can have a life with me!"

"Ace..."

"Look, I know you don't quite feel about me like I feel about you.  I know you can't, really."

"I do care about you, Ace.  Really.  But..."

"Please, we can - can't we pretend?  Just for a while?"

"That wouldn't be fair to either of us.  You know it.  It wouldn't be fair to the Doctor, either."

"Since when've you wanted to be fair to him?"

"Well, they say you should do unto others as you'd have them do unto you."

"That's not how it works.  Not with him."

A tight, false smile broke across Raine's face.  She nodded.

"I know."

They stood there for a long time, not speaking.  Ace was uncertain what would happen, where they would go from here.  At last, Raine leant in and kissed her on the cheek.

"I'm going to get something to eat.  You hungry?"

Ace shook her head.

Late that night (or what passed for night in the TARDIS) they lay curled up in bed, back to back.  They had tried to go back to the way things were a day ago, a week ago, before their most recent hell.  Raine had been soft and warm, accommodating really, but it had been clear that even she was disinterested.  Ace had pulled away, lied about being tired.

Their room would no longer be their room very soon.  It would be just Ace's room again.  She could sense that, and there was an odd calmness that washed over her when she thought about it.  She would be alone again, but not really.  There was always the Doctor, and whoever they met in their travels and kept up with for a while.  There was always someone.

Sighing heavily, Ace turned over and let her arm wrap around Raine's waist.  There was always someone, even when you wanted the one you could never keep.


End file.
